Hello I'm Rich Brown and this is my personal website and blog. I'm just your simple, average, down to earth, professional, out gay man and aspiring circuit boy, living in Phoenix, Arizona with a few things to say while trying to find my place among all the scary, conservative, religious nuts in this sick and twisted world.
Saturday, April 16, 2005
Is The Word 'Queer' Offensive?
@HOME. Ok so my fellow 'Queer Friendly' blogger, Jude, brought to light this question with me and her readers. 'Is the word Queer still considered to be offensive?" I posted this comment on her Blog, but I think it's valuable, so I'll repost it on here as well ...
Since you asked, here is your language lesson for the day. Queer is one of those words we consider to be a 'reclaimed' word. For many years it used to have highly offensive overtones and was considered to be a slur, but for the most part that has changed in our community. Activist Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender (LGBT) people and groups such as Act Up! started to use the word 'Queer' over the past two decades as a positive term of self-reference. This use really reclaimed the word for us as a reference for the entire LGBT community as a whole.
We find it more common these days to use the term 'Gay' in reference only to homosexual men. Many Lesbian women, Bisexuals or Transgendered people do not want to be referred to as 'Gay' anymore, even though we sometimes still use the term 'Gay Community' to be completely inclusive. These days 'LGBT' is the politically correct way to refer to the entire community. 'Queer' is also acceptable for this use and is becoming more mainstream since things such as 'Queer as Folk' the TV Show, and 'Queer' based websites have become mainstream as well. It really comes down to usage. As long as it's not intentionally used for the purpose of trying to be a slur or offensive, it's not. No one is going to think that an image saying 'Queer Friendly' on your site is offensive at all, they will actually probably think it's pretty cool for you to put something like that up. However, if you go walking up the street yelling 'you stupid Queers' then people would probably find that offensive :-)
Everyone has their language choices these days, and it seems like 'Gay' only refers to homosexual men, 'Lesbian' only refers to homosexual women and so on, it's all really dependent on the individual and their choices. Certain people prefer one word over the other, and it's still pretty confusing to even most of us in the LGBT community.
I personally used to hate the word 'Queer' because of the way my father always used it as a negative reference such as 'your cousin is a queer ...' It used to make me cringe, but gradually as things started to change and the community started to embrace the word, I became completely comfortable with it and also in turn myself. I use the word in several places and links on my own blog and website.
So I say, don't be afraid of the word, as we have reclaimed it and embraced it, but more importantly, thanks for your caring and support!
Just like you cringed when your father used the word queer in a derogitory way, I have always cringed when I heard people use it the same way as I grew up. That and the word "fairy" always made me mad. To me it is no different than using all the other rude words out there that "describe" people of certain colour, faith, or nationality, and I have always walked away from people who did that.
However, I am glad to hear that the gay community has "reclaimed" the word queer for your own! You've turned a negative into a positive and that's great in my books. (that may not have been the intent of course, but for all of us straight people who haven't got a clue, that's what it symbolizes ~ to me anyway.)
Thanks again Rich for setting me straight and giving me some "edjukatin'" on the subject! And lesbians aren't called "gay" anymore? Who knew?? Sheesh, I've a long way to go to be informed.... lol ;)
|______________________________________________________________________ posted by Jude @ Saturday, April 16, 2005 3:24:00 PM
Queer still makes me cringe and I know many lesbians who hate the "L" word preferring gay woman, instead. Guess it just goes to show no group has a representative voice to decide how it should self-identify. And I'm not sure this reclaiming thing really works. Rude words are rude words, and I too walk away from people who use them. It certainly doesn't for me. I would never be offended being called gay by a straight person. But please don't call me or my friends queer. Maybe Rich still needs a little edjukatin.
|______________________________________________________________________ posted by trey @ Saturday, April 16, 2005 4:10:00 PM
Like I said ... certain people prefer different things and if you find it rude or offensive that's your right and I'm not here to tell you or anyone else you are wrong. As for me I personally find the words 'Fag and Faggot' offensive in or out of our community and thats my right.
I don't think I need a little education, what I stated was simply my opinion. I never proclaimed to be trying to provide a voice to a specific group, however I did answer a question and gave the most widely agreed upon opinion of the useage of the word 'Queer' in the LGBT community today.
I personally don't see how the word Queer can be seen as rude since national television stations have shows such as 'Queer Eye for the Straight Guy', 'Queer as Folk' and we have things such as the 'Queer Resource Directorys', 'Queer News', and 'QueerAmerica'.
I think in today's society we are all so focused on or being forced into becomming uber politically correct. You can pretty much take any word out of the dictionary and someone will find offense to it. You just cannot make everyone happy all the time. I think what we really should be worried about is fighting the mindset and bigotry itself thats behind the words and learning to not let these words of hate, ignorance or racism tear us up inside.
Harvey Fierstein said in this months broadcast of In The Life, the PBS Gay and Lesbian TV News Magazine, that "if we provide a prision for ourselves ... they will gladly keep us locked up ... "
|______________________________________________________________________ posted by Rich Brown @ Saturday, April 16, 2005 5:27:00 PM
One last thing ... here is a usage note regarding queer from the modern dictionary.
"Usage Note: A reclaimed word is a word that was formerly used solely as a slur but that has been semantically overturned by members of the maligned group, who use it as a term of defiant pride. Queer is an example of a word undergoing this process. For decades queer was used solely as a derogatory adjective for gays and lesbians, but in the 1980s the term began to be used by gay and lesbian activists as a term of self-identification. Eventually, it came to be used as an umbrella term that included gay men, lesbians, bisexuals, and transgendered people. Nevertheless, a sizable percentage of people to whom this term might apply still hold queer to be a hateful insult, and its use by heterosexuals is often considered offensive. Similarly, other reclaimed words are usually offensive to the in-group when used by outsiders, so extreme caution must be taken concerning their use when one is not a member of the group."
|______________________________________________________________________ posted by Rich Brown @ Saturday, April 16, 2005 5:32:00 PM
Amen Rich ~ well said!! That was EXACTLY my point, and the reason I asked the question in the first place, simply so that I would not offend anybody with my lack of knowledge about the gay community. I don't watch a lot of TV and wasn't aware there are shows like "Queer as Folk" etc. I would have probably not watched them, thinking they were slamming gays, lol!! See? You're still edjukating this straight gal Rich, and I thank you for it! :)
|______________________________________________________________________ posted by Jude @ Saturday, April 16, 2005 8:49:00 PM
