@HOME ON VACATION. This actually happened last Friday before we left for San Diego. Let me give some background here first before I share the story. Justin and I have two cars, one of them being an Xterra. We never really drive the Xterra much because it's a gas hog and we carpool to work, so there's usually no need. The only times the Xterra usually gets driven is if one of us is in the office and the other is at home or we are taking Berger somewhere with us. (Thus why we consider it the doggie truck.) Anyway, the registration and insurance were just renewed so the new registration sticker and new insurance cards were both on my desk awaiting to get put on and into the truck. So ... Justin had an appointment with our Doctor in Phoenix and wasn't sure where the new office was located so he asked me to go with him. Because I was working from home and didn't feel like getting ready in the morning to go into the office with him, I picked him up after work in the Xterra and we headed to his appointment. Following the appointment we were pretty hungry and neither of us had lunch. We decided to stop somewhere and have an early dinner since we needed to get home to do some laundry and get things ready before leaving for San Diego in the morning. I suggested going to AZ-88 since it was still pretty early and wouldn't be crowded yet. Justin agreed and so we headed over to Scottsdale. Taking my usual route I turned down Brown into Old Towne Scottsdale and then onto 2nd Ave which leads right into the Arts Center parking garage next to where AZ-88 is located. I pulled into the garage and saw a space right in front, sweet I thought, princess parking! So I parked the Xterra and we both started to get out of the car. "GET BACK IN YOUR CAR"
is all I heard when I stepped completely out of the car. I turned around and saw someone standing behind the car wearing a bike helmet and something slightly resembling a police uniform. I looked down and and saw he had a gun, so indeed it must actually be a REAL uniform I thought, and indeed it was, he was a Scottsdale Police officer on the bike patrol. Anyway I stood there in dismay for a second as he picked up his radio from his belt and began to speak information about my license plate into it. Hmmm ... oh shit I thought, I forgot to put the registration sticker on the plate so must have seen that and that's why he's here. I said to him "Oh ... um ... my car's registered I just forgot to put the new sticker on the plate, it's at home ... "
"I need your license, registration and proof of current insurance and GET BACK IN YOUR CAR" he said to me.
So I'm thinking great, I have have my license but both the current registration and insurance papers are at home on my desk. I reach into my pocket to pull out my wallet so that I can get my drivers license out before I sit back down in the car, to which I was really confused about anyway, since we were getting out to go to dinner. "GET BACK IN YOUR CAR ... THIS IS THE THIRD TIME AND I'M NOT GOING TO TELL YOU AGAIN! ... " he said with hand on his gun looking at me.
Ok well that immediately switched my irritation mood switch to on. It's the little things that set that one off. This isn't going to turn out well I thought to myself. So as I'm getting into the car I decided to belt out "Chill out man, you need to loose the the attitude!"
"WHAT DID YOU SAY TO ME?" he said.
"I said you don't need to get an attitude with me it's not necessary, I was just getting out because we're going to dinner here ..." I replied to him.
"I don't HAVE an attitude ... I told you to get back into your car three times." he said.
"I'm going to dinner here ... that's why I was getting out of my car" I replied.
"Do you know why I pulled you over tonight?" he said.
"EXCUSE ME? PULLED ME OVER? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT .... I just parked here and was getting out to go to dinner here ... " I replied in frustration.
Ok stop the press. What is this fool talking about pulling me over. He's on a damn 10 speed bicycle. Are you freaking kidding me. Justin and I looked at each other in dismay.
"Are you aware that you ran the stop sign at 2nd and Brown" he said.
"Um ... I'm sure I did no such thing" I replied.
"Sir, you slowed down to approximately 5 MPH but did not come to a complete stop and then turned onto 2nd street, there were 3 of us sitting there watching you" he said.
You've got to be freaking kidding me I thought. Ok, yeah I probably did because I was basically turning into the parking lot on 2nd street, Justin and I were talking and there wasn't a car in sight. And just for the record, it was much less then 5 MPH because I would never blatantly go through a stop sign like that. But apparently I did not bring my vehicle to a complete stop, which yes I'm aware is against the law, and I'm usually pretty concisions about that. I guess this wasn't one of those times though.
"Sigh ..." I had nothing more to say.
"Your insurance is expired do you have proof of current insurance" he asked.
"My insurance is valid, the policy number is the same, the dates are expired and I don't have the new card with me" I said.
"Can you check for it sir?" he said.
Ok where the fuck am I supposed to check? Oh yeah, there it is UP MY ASS ... right ... I completely forgot I put it there. Moron. I guess he didn't understand the words 'I DON'T HAVE ... WITH ME' ... I suppose he thought it was impossible that I would really know that I didn't have it and that I should check somewhere for it.
"It's not in here, it's on my desk at home" I said.
"You don't seem to have your current registration paper either sir" he said.
"No I don't have that either, it's also at home on my desk with the sticker" I replied.
"Where are you coming from sir?" he asked me.
"Um .... Camelback Road ... I don't really see how that's relevant" I said.
He looked at me and then walked away. Maybe I should have said "Happy Hour" or something that would have made this whole situation really interesting, but I didn't. I was already irritated enough I figured it wouldn't be good if I got hauled into the station. The officer checked out some other things on my car, provided some information via radio to the station and then finally brought me the ticket after several minutes.
"I'm citing you for failure to stop at a stop sign. If you haven't gone to defensive driving school in 2 years, that's an option for you to avoid having the citation and points go on your record. I'm also citing you for no proof of current insurance which is a fine start at $923, however if you bring or mail in proof of current insurance the citation will be dropped. I didn't mean to give you attitude if that's what you thought but you have to understand that there are 2 of you and one of me, and I was asking you to get back into the car for my safety."
Great, I should have just backed over him and his bike and avoided the ticket, I thought. So I signed the paper stating that I acknowledge receipt of the citations.
"You should really get your current registration and insurance in your vehicle" he said.
"I'll do that, I don't usually drive this vehicle, I was just just picking him up and had forgotten to get the recent documents into the car" I replied.
"Have a nice evening Sir" he said and then hopped back onto his bicycle and rode off into the Scottsdale sunset.
You've got to be kidding me. I wonder what he would have done if I said 'You ever take it off any sweet jumps?' Probably was a good idea that I didn't. Now I'm stuck with a day of $120 defensive driving school to get $137 ticket dismissed. All I can say is that it's my own fault. I guess I'll come to a complete stop next time.
