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Hello I'm Rich Brown and this is my personal website and blog. I'm just your simple, average, down to earth, professional, out gay man and aspiring circuit boy, living in Phoenix, Arizona with a few things to say while trying to find my place among all the scary, conservative, religious nuts in this sick and twisted world.
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Tuesday, February 27, 2007 |
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Philosophical Discussion of the Day
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You know it's funny that when I posted my question and discussion the other day regarding what word would your friends use to describe you, it prompted a number of comments and feedback. It's still something that resonates in my mind, but to put all of you who know me at ease, the context of that topic was not prompted by any of my friends unintentionally categorizing me that way. It really was just a topic of discussion I was having over dinner and I thought it would be a good point to make here on my blog. Something for people to think about. I tend to enjoy saying things that make people think.
So the last thing I'll say about that previous post is what I believe would be the answer to that question for me personally. Many of you who read my blog know me very well while some of you only know me through my postings and photos. I do know that if you polled my closest friends, you would probably get several different answers about what word(s) best describe me, but I can guarantee that 'gay' would not be in their list of top choices. While I am gay, it's not the only thing that defines me, nor is it the primary focus of my life. A few words that I think would be used to describe me would be 'driven', 'motivated', 'funny', 'sarcastic', 'loyal', 'procrastinator', 'stubborn', 'controlling', and 'obsessive'. Maybe even 'asshole' at times depending on which of my friends you ask. I do recognize that while I have a number of good traits, I do have several negative ones too, but hey no one is perfect right?
So now onto other things. While I say that being gay is only a part of what makes up Rich Brown, I do have to admit, while it doesn't completely define me as a person, it is something that influences many aspects of my life and thinking. I was talking to Mark for a bit today and I was telling him how much I feel like my life has changed for the better since I've embarked on this new path in my life. One of the main points I brought up with him was the simple fact that I'm completely out and open in my life these days and I could never go back to pretending to be something I'm not, straight and single. Something that I had done for many years since my University days for fear that my true secret identity would somehow stifle my career and social relationships.
I had a similar conversation with Jerry earlier today about this too. Jerry and I agree how it's almost a responsibility for us (gay & lesbians) these days to be out in our everyday lives and be publicly visible in society. Only when we are visible to the masses can people begin to understand that the differences between all of us are infinitesimally small and in the end we all really want the same things in life. To be happy, successful, perhaps have a family, and live our lives without fear, regret or repression.
I look back on my life over the last 10 years or so, and while I did what I felt was necessary to further my career, I know now that I will never again hide who I am for the sake of some else's comfort level. It's never really something that's easy to deal with especially when you meet new people, but I've found some liberating sense of freedom these days in telling people that I am indeed not single, but in a long-term relationship with my partner of 6 years, Justin. It sort of throws it right out there and ends the need to answer any further questions that might make either party uneasy.
With all of this said, it's really a personal choice for me, and I would never impose my feelings upon anyone else. I believe in free will and free choice and I think people have to come to conclusions like this on their own. I can completely understand there are cases of gay men and women in other countries who face uncertain consequences with the revelation of their true sexual orientation, and to these people I feel truly sorry you have been put into such a situation. When it comes to basic survival, then of course it's wise to do whatever is necessary. However, for those of us here in the United States who are lucky enough to be living in the land of opportunity, I would challenge anyone who is not out to co-workers, friends and family to seriously think of what a better world it could be if everyone would come out and help enlighten the masses in this world.
Ok, maybe this isn't so much of a philosophical discussion, but more of a small rant on my part, but you get my point here. I'd love to see more people come out and be open with both themselves and their lives. I've made a conscious decision to not hide my identity on the Internet, to post photos of myself and friends, and write about my life and what I'm thinking. I don't censor myself nor do I go out of my way anymore to create a false facade in public. My real name indeed is Rich Brown and I want people to know me for who am I, my interests and what I have to say. These days I don't offer any apologies for who I am and I'm proud to say that I am living my life as a somewhat socially-well-adjusted, out gay man with a great group of friends and a small, somewhat unhealthy interest in very strong mixed drinks. Cheers.Labels: Gay Life, Random Thoughts
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Kenny Is Hot ... So Is MTV's Dance Life
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So yeah ... I'm totally addicted to the show Dance Life on MTV. Created by Jenifer Lopez, It's basically about a handful of real-world, professional dancers trying to make it in Los Angeles. It chronicles their lives and careers. I actually find it fascinating how they have to constantly audition for jobs and their interaction with the big stars. I dunno, it's a pretty cool show. And yeah ... Kenny is hot.
Damn those pretty boy, metro sexual, straight boys. ;-) He's a smoking hot dancer. Check out Kenny on MTV's Dance Life or his MySpace profile at http://www.myspace.com/kennyworm. Cheers!Labels: Hot Guys, TV Shows
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I'm Happy and Going to Los Angeles
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So here it is, 2:30 AM and I'm laying here in bed waiting for Justin to finish what he's doing so that we can go to bed. We decided to head over to the gym tonight around 11 and proceeded to engage in a grueling 2 hour workout consisting of chest, back and then onto legs. We're trying to play catch up since the White Party is only 6 weeks away.
As I lay here thinking about my life and the events over the past few weeks I can't help to proclaim how happy I am. Life, work, friends, my relationship ... it's all going so well. I really couldn't ask for things to be better. And when it comes to work, I never thought I would say this because it's not something that I ever really remember experiencing before, but I'm absolutely in love with my job and what I'm doing these days. Everyday is a new challenge and they days just fly by anymore.
One of the perks of my new career is that I can pretty much work from anywhere I choose. Because of this I've decided to head out to Los Angeles this weekend and stay all next week with Philip and just work from Los Angeles. I'm actually looking forward to getting out of Phoenix for more then just a weekend trip to Los Angeles and being able to spend some quality time with Philip. I'm looking forward to testing out how the remote work environment is going to work out for me. I even think I'm going to take my laptop down to West Hollywood one day and sit at a coffee shop and just work from there. I think it will be nice to get out for a bit and take it all in. One of the other advantages of me going to Los Angeles for an extended time is that I'll get a chance to catch up with a few friends who are living there and I haven't been able to see much of lately. It's all good and I'm really looking forward too it.
Friday, March 9th is Philip's birthday and Justin and Jerry have decided to fly out to LA for the weekend and drive back to Phoenix with me on Sunday. When the flights are only $50 each way to LA from Phoenix, it's really hard not to just jump on a flight for the weekend. Bernard won't be able to make it because he's going to be in Hawaii sunning himself, which sucks but it's going to be a short weekend for everyone anyway and we'll all be together again at the White Party in the beginning of April.
Well anyway, it's getting to be about that time, I just thought I would write a quick post before bed. I really am happy right now and I'm looking forward to the future. Oh yeah, one last thing before I leave you ... if you haven't seen 'The Secret' I would suggest watching it. Justin and I picked it up and watched it on Saturday night. Now while it's similar to some other books I've read, it offers a very unique view point which I completely believe in. I discovered 'The Secret' on my own last year and it's really helped to change my life, so watch it and we'll discuss another time. :-) Cheers!Labels: Gay Life, Travel
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Thursday, February 22, 2007 |
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Justin's New Hair
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Let me preface this story for a second ...
Prior to Justin and I going out to San Francisco, Justin asked Bernard if he would mind cutting his hair. I think he was just looking for something new and didn't know what to do with it.  This isn't something we usually ask Bernard, because when we're all together we just like to hang out, enjoy our time and not force work upon someone, but Bernard agreed. While it may seem somewhat stereotypical to be a hairstylist, my friend Bernard in San Francisco is definitely not stereotypical, and he's probably one of the most talented hair stylist's I've ever met. You would consider yourself lucky if he would even take you as a client. It's like the mafia, he picks you, you don't pick him. I think my favorite quote from Bernard is ... "oh no, I don't do weddings"
So anyway, last Friday night after we downed a few drinks in the Castro with my friends, Bernard asked Justin if he wanted to go back to the salon with him. Justin agreed. Bernard dropped the rest of us off at his place so we could hang out and rest while Justin and he headed over to Bernard's of San Francisco.
I think it was around 3AM when Justin and Bernard arrived back at Bernard's place and I was so tired I could barely look up. Justin walked in so proud and proclaimed 'Do you like it?' I could hardly muster enough energy to turn my head, but I did to appease him and tell him how fabulous he looked. Well shit the bed, I almost fell off the couch. I didn't know what to say, my little boy was now a stunning blond bombshell.
Apparently Bernard decided that Justin needed to go for a little color as well as a cut. As always Bernard did an amazing job, because it looks great. I couldn't help but to keep staring at Justin over the next few days because it was just such a different look for him. Apparently others felt the same way as they practically knocked us all over trying to get next to Justin to say hello at the parties.
I didn't know what to think at first, but he likes the look and it makes him happy so there you go. Just between you and me, I secretly like it too, so it's all good in my book.Labels: Bernard, Justin Chanley, San Francisco
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Wednesday, February 21, 2007 |
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Let the Hard Workouts Begin Again
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With the White Party Palm Springs only a month away it's time for Justin and I to get serious about our workouts again. We've been hanging out in maintain mode for the past few months since Black & Blue in Montreal and have decided that tonight is the night we're going to hit the ground running again. I'm anxious to see how much we can accomplish this time in one month, since we achieved some amazing gains last year in this same time frame. Labels: Circuit Party, Justin Chanley, White Party, White Party Palm Springs, Working Out
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Update Your Links Please
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Sorry kids ... but I've decided to move.
Instead of http://rich.cyrek.net/blog/ I'm now viewable at http://rich.cyrek.net and http://rich.cyrek.net/atom.xml Yeah that's right I decided to take the bigger room (web path) down the hall. It was a bitch moving all my furnature (files) but I finally decided to do it because I really hated that /blog/ at the end of my URL.
Next up ... new decorating (web design) ... Yeah right! Like I have time for decorating.Labels: Technology
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Tuesday, February 20, 2007 |
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Back from San Francisco
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It was a worldwind tour weekend out on Friday night, and back to Phoenix last night. It seems as if we managed to pack two weeks worth of activities into the small space of a few days. It was great seeing my friends again, and doing the thing we love to do ... party of course. I need to cut this short for now because I have a lot of work to catch up on and I simply don't have the energy to write a long post. More to come later!
Justin, Jerry, Philip, Rich & Bernard at Fresh @ Ruby SkyeLabels: Bernard, Circuit Party, Gay Life, Jerry Timms, Justin Chanley, San Francisco
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Thursday, February 15, 2007 |
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Kimberly S. at Burn Nightclub in Phoenix
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Well as luck would have it Kimberly S. is going to be in Phoenix this weekend for the Sunday T-Dance at Burn Nightclub as the official White Party Palm Springs Kick-off Event and we're going to be in San Francisco.
Actually I'm a little bummed about not getting to see Kimberly, but Justin and I are both super excited about heading up to San Francisco to spend some time with Bernard, Philip, & Jerry. At least I can sleep easy at night knowing that I'll get to see Kimberly S. at both the White Party and One Mighty Weekend in Orlando in June where she'll be spinning. Who Hoo. *Golf Clap*
Anyway, for more information about Kimberly S. check out her website at http://www.djkimberlys.com/Labels: Burn Nightclub Phoenix, Circuit Party, DJ Kimberly S, Phoenix, White Party, White Party Palm Springs
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Tuesday, February 13, 2007 |
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What Would Be The First Word?
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If you were to pass a piece of paper out to everyone you know and ask them to pick one word which would be used to describe you to someone who doesn't know you, what word would they choose?
The reason this topic comes to mind today stems from a conversation I had with friends over the weekend regarding how 'the gays' are often categorized first as 'gay' before anything else when being described. I don't know why this seems to be the case, but it's most often the first word chosen by our straight friends to describe us. I've been introduced as 'my gay friend', 'my gay cousin', 'the gay guy I was telling you about', etc. And to take it a bit further, that first word categorization of 'the gays' really only happens to us. People would not typically pick a trait such as 'black' or 'woman' or 'straight' as their first choice to describe someone, but it seems to work differently for the gay community. I'm really not quite sure why they like to categorize us so freely by sexuality as the first word of choice.
After some discussion among some of my gay friends we've agreed that it it probably stems from the fact that most straight people still view being gay as a trait of choice. The really interesting thing here is that if you were to take a group of gay friends and ask the same question among those friends, I would bet that not one of them would pick the term 'gay' for any of the others. Maybe it's because that would be stating the obvious, or maybe because we simply know better. I think it's more of the latter, because I would never choose the word 'straight' to describe someone, even if it was true and that person was the only one of that category in the group. I just don't find it appropriate.
I don't know I'm not trying to be overly sensitive about this, and for the record it's not something that any of my close friends have done in a long time, it's just something that sparked a little bit of a discussion among some of us and I thought I would throw it out there for the rest of you.
So what all that said ... what word would they choose for you? (Actually I'd like to know what word you would choose for me too! ... see I'm just a curious vain bitch like that!)Labels: Gay Life, Random Thoughts
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Monday, February 12, 2007 |
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A Short Weekend But A Long Night
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After our little jaunt to the science center to see Body Worlds 3, we headed over to FEZ with everyone to grab a bite to eat. I have to say that I was really impressed by both the food and the service there. It was a fun place, with really good fare. I would definitely recommend it.
We finished up our late lunch and headed home before reconvening for another Saturday night spent at Burn Nightclub. As I said last week, Burn is turning into our Saturday night ritual and I of course was looking forward to showing Philip the newest addition to the Phoenix bar scene.
We arrived at Burn Nightclub around 10 PM and met up with Philip's friend Mike who is back in town from Orange County for a few months.
   
The crowd really picked up around 11 and with the help of DJ Jeremy the place was absolutely hopping. I don't know what it is, maybe the strong drinks, hot guys, or fun people, but Burn really is the place to be on Saturday nights these days. Over the past month, my friends and I have simply had the best times at Burn.
The night progressed and once again we closed out the bar, but not before getting a chance to talk to DJ Jeremy, Angela, and a few friends. We decided to head up to Charlie's again for afterhours. Justin drove, and I found out the hard way that I had a little too much to drink. I'll just leave it at that because the details of the story are not necessary except to know that they end with me spending the rest of the evening hung out of the car window in the Charlie's parking log immediately followed by me passing out at home and waking up this morning with a pretty nasty hangover. I really didn't think I had that much to drink but I guess I was wrong. Let's just say I'm going to take some time off from the booze, at least until Friday! I told the boys today that I was going to have to go back to the science center and pick up my liver that was on display there. I wonder if they'll just keep the nasty one and let me take the healthy liver instead. LOL. I know it's not really anything to joke about, but I don't do this often, so I'll just leave it at that.
So the weekend wound down today as I got Philip to the airport and off back to Los Angeles. Justin, Jerry and I went for a bit to eat at the newly revamped Burger Betty's before heading back to Jerry's house for a bit of conversation.
It was a great weekend and as always was fun to be with Philip but too short. Jerry, Justin and I will be headed up to San Francisco this weekend to meet Philip and stay at Bernard's place. It's going to be another world wind weekend tour around San Francisco with with boys and I'm tired already just thinking about it. At least you can say we're living life to the fullest, and let me tell you, it's damn fun these days too. Cheers.Labels: Burn Nightclub Phoenix, Gay Bars, Jerry Timms, Justin Chanley, Phoenix
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Body Worlds 3 At The Arizona Science Center
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The controversial anatomical exhibition of real human bodies is currently on display at the Arizona Science Center here in Phoenix. This display is something that I thought would be very interesting to see, but never imagined I would have the opportunity to see it soon, so as you can imagine when I found out it was coming to Phoenix, I immediately wanted to go.
 
As luck would have it, Andrea knows the President & CEO of the Arizona Science center, so she was given the opportunity to purchase tickets for a group of us to go on Saturday afternoon.
Mark, Andrea, Don, Kris, Philip, Jerry, Justin and I headed up to the Science Center around 1 PM for our time slot. After arriving I was immediately astonished at the line of people that stretched out the door and around to the side of the Science Center. I think Andrea best put it when she said that she was proud of Phoenix for supporting this event and coming out. Thankfully since Andrea has pre-purchased the tickets, we were able to bypass the line and go right inside. After a small wait and a few difficulties we finally arrived inside the main lobby of the exhibit.
At first it was a little eerie as you were presented with pieces of bones, joints and organs, as well as full body plastinates revealing the amazing construction of the human body. Walking in the crowd was almost silent, even though it was incredibly crowded. I quickly immersed myself in into the exhibit and the accompanying audio which narrated the exhibits. I lost track of everyone else in our group for a while as I studied the plastinate bodies, organs, bones and image slices. It was all so fascinating to me.
Of all the items at this exhibit there were 2 which especially caught my attention. The first being the display of a healthy lung next to a smokers lung. The smokers lung was almost completely black and appears to be almost like a large lump of coal in the glass case. It was the clearest display of the damage smoking does to your body that I've ever seen. After seeing the display I was really glad that I don't smoke. The 2ND display of the exhibit which really moved me was something called the Orthopaedic Woman. It was a female body which had examples of the most common orthopaedic surgeries which take place. This plastinate had a hip replacement, and elbow replacement, arm braces, jaw braces and more. It was an amazing display of the possibilities of modern medicine. I was really blown away by the realization of how much effort it is for these doctors to replace damaged body parts, and I gained a new respect for the surgeons who are capable enough to perform such complex surgeries.
Towards the middle of the exhibit I found Mark and we finished up the displays together. The rest of the crew was a bit faster then us and were waiting at the end of the exhibit. It was a very informative and educational exhibit, and while it has drawn much controversy over the years, it was definitely worth seeing.Labels: Jerry Timms, Justin Chanley
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Saturday, February 10, 2007 |
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Friday Night On The Town
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I think I mentioned in another post that Philip was headed out to Phoenix this weekend to hang out. Justin, Andrea, Mark and I picked Philip up at the airport around 9 PM and headed up to pick up Jerry before going over to Cheuvront's for some dinner. Cheuvront's in Phoenix on Central is a trendy & fun wine bar with a great wine, cheese and dinner menu. As we always do when Philip is around is laugh, and Friday night was certainly not lacking in the laughter department. It was fun piling everyone in the car and heading out on the town.
Following dinner we headed out for some drinks and decided to check out Amsterdam. It really felt like we hadn't been out at Amsterdam in a long time. I wasn't surprised to find the bar fairly empty for a Friday night. I remember not too long ago it would be extremely crowded all weekend, but since the opening of Burn, it just seems like everyone has lost interest in Amsterdam. I guess it's true that there really is a limited amount of people in Phoenix, and perhaps it just can't handle have two trendy places. I suppose that's a conversation best saved for another day.
  
Around 1 AM we decided to pack in the car and head up to Charlies for afterhours. Once again it wasn't a very pretty crowd, but I did run into a few people I haven't seen in a while, so it was a good time. Mark also was able to snap a quick photo with the legendary Barbara Seville.
We stayed at Charlie's for a few hours and then packed into the car and headed back to our house to continue drinking. It was a fun night, and the start of a good weekend with Philip in town.Labels: Gay Bars, Jerry Timms, Justin Chanley, Phoenix
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Thursday, February 08, 2007 |
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Thursday Night Out With The Boys
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After dinner at Red Robin with Mark & Andrea, Mark, Justin, Jerry and I decided to go out on the town for a beer. Jerry has been going over to the Sky Lounge over the past few Thursdays so we decided to join him.
On our way to the Sky Lounge we decided to first stop and Burn Nightclub and check it out.
 
There were only a handful of people at Burn, but it was actually nice to be able to grab a drink, stand and chat among friends for a little bit. We finished up 2 rounds before heading over to the Sky Lounge.
Thursday night is now the defacto gay night at Sky Lounge and it was split between two floors, with the upper floor being over 21 only and the lower floor being over 18. We immediately headed to the 2ND floor to grab some drinks. It was a rather amusing and diverse crowd consisting of thugs, wannabe gay gang-bangers, lesbian biker chicks, and others. We took a survey of the room while we finished our drinks and decided that the music was just a bit too loud and we should just walk back over to Burn so that we could talk.
We closed out the rest of the evening at Burn talking with each other and Chris, the hot, straight bartender who was working. He was aptly named 'Starpits' by Jerry for the two star tattoos he had under each bicep. Wanting to see what other tattoos he wasn't showing us, I asked him why he didn't have his shirt off. He laughed and told me to come back on Saturday night and he would. While Justin and I don't usually go out during the week much, we had a fun time with Jerry and Mark and were glad we got out and were able to blow off some steam.Labels: Burn Nightclub Phoenix, Jerry Timms, Justin Chanley, Phoenix
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Wednesday, February 07, 2007 |
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Ok So I'm A Bad Blogger
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Yes I know, my posts are sporadic these days. I always think about writing but when it comes down to the wire I usually have something more important which arises. I can't say my life is boring these days. With trying to wrap everything up at Bank of America and getting all the little details setup with my company, to maintaining my very active social life, I'm just downright busy. True I bring much of this on myself, because I could probably cut out some of my social activities, but hell what fun would that be after all.
I do, however, have to say that even amid all this self-imposed activity I have never been happier. My stress level has been reduced, I actually look forward to working these days and more then ever I'm enjoying spending time with my friends, all of them.
I'm a little backlogged on the photos and postings over the past few weeks, but as I finished much of the final remaining chores I had assigned to myself, I can now sit back, take some time and get back to writing. I'm looking forward to getting caught up on that over the next few days. Thanks to everyone for the support and well-wishes on my new adventure. In answer to the question, yes I will probably end up blogging more now that I don't have to go into the office to work, and no my circuit party photos will not be decreased. As a matter of fact it already looks like a full calendar for this year on that front.
Anyway, I'm looking forward to a fun weekend in the city. Philip is coming out to Phoenix for the weekend and thanks to Andrea, we're all headed over to the Arizona Science Center to see Body Worlds 3 which should be pretty damn fascinating. Well that's about it for now, I'll have more to say later. Adios.Labels: Aventera Consulting, Phoenix
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Sunday, February 04, 2007 |
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Tracy's Birthday Bash & Dancing At Burn Nightclub
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Saturday night brought about a small get together at Bruce & Tracy's house in celebration of Tracy's recent birthday. I enjoy spending time with Bruce & Tracy since they are both really great guys and they have a lot of fun friends. I met Tracy a few years ago at work and his partner Bruce very soon after at our very first party at the Ice House. One of the very few things I will miss most about working at Bank of America will be my inability to stop by Tracy's office to say hi. I guess Justin and I will just have to make a bigger effort to hang out with them more this year.
I didn't have my camera at Tracy's party, so unfortunately I don't have any photos of the gathering or of the spectacular chocolate cake that was served for the celebration.
Immediately following the gathering, everyone headed over to Burn Nightclub in Phoenix for a little dancing.
Justin & Tracy
Rich & Paul from our gym
Justin & Jerry
As always, we drank, danced and closed the bar out. Going out to Burn on Saturday night really seems to be turning into a weekly ritual for Justin, Jerry and I. Following our evening at Burn Nightclub, Jerry, Justin and I decided to head up to Charlie's for afterhours. It's been month's since we've actually been out to Charlie's and I suppose we thought we'd check it out to see if anything has changed. To be honest it wasn't a really pretty crowd there so I could have just skipped it. We closed out the afterhours at Charlies at 4 am and headed over to the Gay Denny's for an early breakfast. It turned into one hell of a long night, but it was a fun evening and I'm glad we got to spend time with Bruce, Tracy and friends. Cheers!Labels: Burn Nightclub Phoenix, Jerry Timms, Justin Chanley, Phoenix
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