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Hello I'm Rich Brown and this is my personal website and blog. I'm just your simple, average, down to earth, professional, out gay man and aspiring circuit boy, living in Phoenix, Arizona with a few things to say while trying to find my place among all the scary, conservative, religious nuts in this sick and twisted world.
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San Diego Pride Review
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           San Diego Pride was a great time this year. We started out on Friday night with the Harbor Cruise. The ship was much larger this year, but unfortunately the crowd was not, so it wasn't very full. Susan did a great job, the music was good, but the crowd just didn't really seem too into the mood so there wasn't a lot of people dancing, just a bunch of people standing around talking. My friends and I did meet a few new people on the cruise which made the event worth attending. Some of my other friends went over to On Broadway to see Victor and they told me that the music was good but it was primarily a straight crowd and that no one was permitted to take off any clothing. One of my friends took off his shirt but still had a tank top on and was told by security to please put his shirt back on. I'll just say I'm glad I decided on the cruise, because the crowd was still very gay and very friendly ;-) As far as I'm concerned the straight crowd can have Victor these days since he’s not really interesting in spinning for the gay boys anymore.
Saturday was a beautiful day along the parade route and at the festival. It was nice to be outside, having fun and getting some sun in the perfect weather of San Diego. Everyone seemed to be in a wonderful mood and completely enjoying themselves. Following the parade through Hillcrest and into Balboa Park is always such a fun walk with many smiling faces. The park itself couldn't be a more beautiful location to hold a festival.
We arrived at the Arena on Saturday evening around 11 PM to find that it was completely decorated and actually setup so that it was turned into a smaller space the normal. It almost felt a bit like being at a prom with the way it was decorated, it was actually a nice change from the bleak look of just a light setup. The crowd never did reach critical mass, it filled up from the front to about ½ way back and that was it. Monte Q did a great job getting everyone warmed up and then Tony Moran came on and kicked it up a notch and got everyone dancing. Tony put on a great set. My friends were afraid he was just going to play his new cd, but he didn't. He managed to get in some of our favorite songs from the new cd, but he really did an awesome job of mixing it up and keeping us all in the mood. We closed out the Arena at 6am and then headed over to the Bacchus House for after-hours until 10am with De Leon. The crowd was thin, but was a good time to chat with a few new friends.
The weather on Sunday couldn't have been any nicer for the Zoo Party. We arrived around 5 PM and it was already filling up. By about 8 PM the entire dance area was packed and there was certainly a lot more people than last year. Phil B did an outstanding job at putting everyone into a great mood and when Manny came on, in typically Manny fashion he really kicked the party into full swing. The great thing about the event is that the dancers and the performance didn't distract from the music, it just all flowed together. It seemed like everyone I knew and met were all having a great time.
Around 11:30 we headed over to 4th & B for the Closing Party and walked into a nearly full room of people. I started to run into friends who I never expected to see at a closing party but they had such a great time at the zoo party they just didn't want to stop dancing. Rosabel certainly never disappoints at a closing party, but let me tell you that place was HOT. Much warmer than last year inside and everyone was absolutely drenched. I almost felt sorry for the dancers who had to stay on those boxes and dance in that crazy heat. At least for the rest of us it was cooler outside so we could head out and take a break and get a little bit of air from time to time. The party started to thin out around 6-7 AM when we decided to call it a weekend and head home.
More of my photos from this event can be found at:
2007-07-20
SD Pride Harbor Cruise
2007-07-21
SD Pride Festival
2007-07-22
SD Pride Zoo Party
All in all it was a great weekend in San Diego. While I was a little disappointed at the attendance at some of the events, the DJ’s all did an amazing job with the crowds and the new friends we all met really made the weekend.
I'm already looking forward to the next party.
Cheers!Labels: Circuit Party, DJ Abel, DJ Manny Lehman, DJ Ralphi Rosario, DJ Tony Moran, Gay Life, Gay Pride, San Diego
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Off To San Diego For Pride
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  It's that time of year again, San Diego Pride and the San Diego Pride Parties.
Jerry and I are making the 5 hour drive over to San Diego this evening and Justin will be flying in tomorrow after he's finished with work. We're meeting up with Bernard and Philip and staying at Tony & DJ's place for a long weekend in the city.
Since it's so close and one of the last Pride events in the season we always try and make it out to San Diego. We've actually taken a bit of a hiatus for several weeks and this is going to be our first party weekend since One Mighty Weekend in Orlando way back in early June. I think we're all ready to get the gang back together again to hang out and cause some trouble.
It's going to be a busy weekend. Aside from the Pride Parade, Party at Tony's house and then the Pride Festival, we also have a full weekend parties scheduled. The Harbor Cruise on Friday night, Circuit Daze at the Sports Arena on Saturday Night, the Zoo Party on Sunday afternoon and the Fete Acompli to close out the weekend from Sunday evening well into Monday morning. It's going to be another jam packed, not stop Circuit weekend.
I'm personally I'm looking forward to getting out of Phoenix for the weekend to seem my friends again and it will certainly be fun to hang out and party it up with the entire San Diego Crew for another weekend of trouble.
I'm not sure if I'm going to post yet over the weekend or not, it just depends on how I feel and how busy the weekend really turns out to be. You can be assured that I'll have plenty of stories and photos for when I get back. If you happen to be in San Diego and attending any of the events, make sure to shoot me an email or say hi when you see me skipping along. LOL. Happy Pride and Cheers!Labels: Circuit Party, San Diego
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Why Do You Choose To Stay Where You Live?
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 Have you ever taken a step back for a moment and questioned where you're living and why you've decided to stay there? I don't mean your house, condo or apartment, but the actual city, state, region, or even country where you are living?
I do it all the time which is probably the reason why I've lived in four different states, and a almost a dozen different cities.
We make our decisions based on knowledge, past experience, gut instinct, and sometimes even by following the whim or demands of another person. The choice of where we live is usually beyond our control for the first decade of our life, but then after becoming an adult we're typically all free to take leave and decide for ourselves which place is best suited for us.
What's fascinating to me is how people choose to live in one area and be perfectly content, while other people find that area completely inhabitable. I would say that living here in Phoenix makes people constantly question their decision to remain here. It's not that Phoenix is a bad place to live, because it's really not, it's because during the peak of the summer months, Phoenix is a pretty difficult place to get used too. Frankly, it's hot here, and some people just don't like the heat. Phoenix is the type of place where people come to find out the true meaning of 'a Dry Heat' and decide if it's tolerable enough for them to remain here. Obviously many people remain based on our growing population, but also many still decide to leave based on the transient nature of the city.
As of late I've had several friends reconsider their decision to remain here and I always seem to have other friends who say "How can you live there, it's so damn hot?" I completely understand when people question living here, because I have myself reconsidered the choice to live here many times. I've even moved away from Phoenix twice now, once to try out Las Vegas and then again to explore San Francisco. Both times I remained away for only a few years before returning back to the desert. Phoenix has cast her spell on me and I just can't seem to stay away for very long. While I really enjoy what other cities have to offer, and I certainly could be perfectly content in these other cities, I really do love living here in Phoenix.
 In the past Phoenix hasn't been the most cosmopolitan of cities, but that's changing as is evident by our growing number of trendy restaurants and bars, boutique hotels, modern shopping, the growing city skyline, and the near completion of the light rail which will span from one end of the city to the other. Phoenix is finally growing out of the awkward, lanky, teen years to take her place as a young adult among the other 4 largest cities in the United States which makes this an exciting time to be here.
While many think that Phoenix is too hot, it's one of my very favorite reasons for living here. Once you spend a year or two getting acclimated to the heat, it's really difficult to ever go back to a colder climate. Not only does the heat make it a wonderful place to be in the winter, but gives us some distinct advantages in the summer. Swimming pools typically never close up, not even for the winter. The dress here is almost always casual meaning shorts and t-shirts are usually acceptable attire nearly everywhere. Because the weather is typically nice and it's always sunny, people generally tend to be very active here in Phoenix and you frequently find very scantily clad, attractive people out and about enjoying the weather. Simply stated, there are always a ton of hot, shirtless guys, wearing only shorts outside. That alone is probably reason enough to keep most of us gay boys here in Phoenix.
Like any other city, Phoenix has both it's advantages and disadvantages. It's certainly not a place for everyone, but I really enjoy being here and Phoenix will always represent my first independent step out of University and away from home. It was a chance for me to get far away from anyone I knew and a place where I could finally be free to come out and be myself. Because of that I've long had a special place in my heart for Phoenix, and no matter where I end up, she will always feel like my real home.
So, why do you choose to stay where YOU live? Cheers!Labels: Phoenix, Random Thoughts
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Why I Think It's The Right Time
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  It was 1992 and just a few short months into my junior year at University. I'll never forget that day, a brisk and overcast November afternoon as I finished up with one of my afternoon classes in the Hammond Building at the Pennsylvania State University Main Campus.
I was walking the route home along College Avenue, wearing jeans, a t-shirt with one of my many fraternity sweatshirts on the outside, and my tan barn jacket from 'The Lodge' was draped over my blue saddle bag which hung from my right shoulder down across my chest to my left side as was the case almost every day on my walk to and from class.
This day was a little different from most because instead of heading right back to my apartment after class or stopping off at the Rathskeller to meet up with a few friends for a beer, I was headed to the local church on College Avenue which served as my districts voting place. It was the presidential election, and for me it was my very first and most significant.
I could hardly contain my excitement, I was actually going to get to vote. It wasn't even an question regarding 'if' I was going to vote as it is with many young adults today, it was simply a matter of 'when' I was going to vote. I mean why wouldn't I, because as a wide-eyed eager liberal University student, I just knew my vote was going to make a difference.
I walked inside, checked in with the volunteers, was handed my ballot and waited my turn in line for one of the voting booths to open up. Before long, I was closing the curtain behind me on the back of my voting booth and ready to cast my vote. I can't remember any of other names on the ballot except for one, William Jefferson Clinton for President. I first cast my vote for Mr. Clinton as President and then carefully read and completed the rest of the ballot. I was so excited to finally be voting. I finished, grabbed my things, exited the voting booth, stuffed my ballot into the box and then eagerly headed home to follow the results of the elections for the rest of the evening on television with my friends.
For me, a closeted university student who was just coming to terms with my own sexuality, Bill Clinton represented something different from the rest of the candidates. He represented the hopes and dreams of an entire gay community and my simple wish that maybe someday it wouldn't be so bad to actually admit to people that I was gay. He also represented the possibility for the inclusion of gay & lesbians in the military which was a huge deal at the time. Mr. Clinton was one of the few politicians during that time who openly talked with the gay community, addressed some of their (our) concerns and even made a few lofty promises which seemed promising. It was a big day for those of us who knew there had to be something more, something different, something better ahead of us.
I don't remember much else from that day, except for the excitement that later arose from my liberal friends and roommate's celebration for Mr. Clinton's victory. Things were going to change now, everything was going to get better.
Over the next 8 years while Mr. Clinton lived up to a few promises, and fell short on others, things did change. In my eyes they changed for the better. I finally came to grips with my own sexuality, met my first boyfriend, and came out to not only my friends but also my family. I graduated from the Pennsylvania State University, got my first job out of school and moved to Arizona. I was proud to be transitioning from a young adult and new university graduate to a somewhat responsible adult with a real life and a real job. I moved to Las Vegas for a year, back to Arizona for a few years and then headed up to San Francisco to be part of the dot-com boom. My career was thriving, I was making good money, times were good. Really good. There was no end in sight. At least that's what we thought until the 2000 election blindsided us all and dropped a huge boulder called George Bush on America. I don't need to go any further because you're all well aware of what happens from there.
 So now after almost 8 years of conservative repression, war, terrorism and global hate for Americans, we're ready for a change, well at least I am. It feels like an eternity from the prosperity and good times we all shared in the 1990's with Bill Clinton as our President, and maybe it's all really just me being nostalgic, but I'm certainly ready for another Clinton Era.
Aside from the fact that Hillary Clinton is the wife of former President Bill Clinton, and former First Lady, I truly believe that America is ready to finally have a female president and I'm confident that Mrs. Clinton can handle the job.
As Americans we take pride in being a modern and cosmopolitan society, forward thinkers who embrace diversity, cherish the values of education and equal rights for everyone right? Ok, on second thought maybe not. Maybe America is simply a majority of flag waving, closed minded, ultra conservative, fundamentalist Christian, country bumpkins who still think a women's place is in the home, and wonder when it was that Barack Obama took off his turban and was allowed to leave Afghanistan to come to the United States and run for president.
Perhaps that is indeed the case, and why George Bush was ultimately elected and even worse, reelected as our President. I would however like to turn a blind eye to that part of America and finally act like the modern society we try so skillfully to portray to the rest of the world. Frankly between Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama, I'm only picking Hillary because I have sentimental reasons for thinking that having the Clinton's in the White House will once again help this country to repair our negative international image, and maybe even boost our economy again. If Barack Obama were to take the Democratic nomination, he would certainly have my full support and I'm quite confident that he too can lead us in the proper direction as a country.
Regardless of who takes the Democratic nomination, I really do think it's the right time for America to grow up, and realize that it's not only a white male who can run this country (or into the ground as may be the current case). It's the right time for us as Americans and an educated society to stand up and say we are free-thinkers, we do value diversity, inclusion and equal rights for all and that we will not blindly follow our leaders into a war for profit. It's the right time to stop shedding our children's blood overseas, to mend strained international relationships, and help the world to realize Americans are generally not bad people. It's the right time for a change. It's now or never, because this country simply can not handle another 8 years of conservatism, repression and regression. Cheers.Labels: World Politics
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Books: What I'm Currently Reading
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 Where The Boys Are
by William Mann
Jeff and his on-again, off-again lover Lloyd Griffith are thirty-something professionals still grieving the death of their mentor, Javitz. Jeff bounces from party to party, forgetting his pain only when he's on the dance floor, immersed in a sea of beautiful boys with sculpted pecs and speed-bump abs. At his side is his protege, best friend, sister, and not-so-secret admirer Henry Weiner, once a ninety-eight-pound weakling who has lately blossomed into a hunky muscle-boy escort.
As the lives of Jeff, Lloyd, and Henry intertwine, each confronts a different challenge. Henry's repressed feelings of love for Jeff propel him on a quest to discover his own identity amid the often-seedy world of sex for cash. Lloyd deals with the dark side of the "fag hag" experience when his Provincetown housemate, Eva, exhibits increasingly bizarre behavior. But the most intriguing mystery of all involves the beautiful stranger Jeff meets at yet another circuit party and invites to move in. Anthony Sabe is a young man seemingly without a past, whose bright-eyed ingenuousness at first charms everyone, but later raises suspicions. When Jeff sets out to uncover the truth about Anthony, what he finds is progressively more disturbing, raising questions not only about Anthony but also about himself.
Over the course of a life-changing summer, Jeff, Lloyd, and Henry deal with the myriad issues confronting gay men today: sex, drugs, grief, AIDS, barebacking, body image, commitment, one-night stands, and the search for love. The first novel to be set on the gay party circuit, Where The Boys Are evokes a world with its own language, customs, traditions, and idiosyncrasies, set to a backdrop of sex, drugs, and dance music.Labels: Books
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Florida lawmaker arrested in gay sex sting
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A Florida state representative and co-chairman of John McCain's presidential campaign was arrested Wednesday for offering to perform oral sex on a male undercover cop in a Titusville, Fla., public restroom, police said.
Rep. Bob Allen, R-Merritt Island, was booked into the Brevard County jail on a charge of solicitation to commit prostitution, the Orlando Sentinel reported, then released on $500 bail. The charge, a second-degree misdemeanor, is punishable by a year in county jail and a $500 fine.
[Read the Full Story]Labels: News
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Shameless Promotion
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Ok I know this is shameless promotion, but if you wouldn't mind taking a second and going to BestMaleBlogs and rate my blog for me I would greately appreciate it.
If you rate me high I'll send you $1. Ok not really but you can still rate me high. :-)
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Out To Burn & Charlies
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 Like most Saturday evenings, Justin and I got ready around 9 and headed downtown to grab a few drinks.
We started out at Amsterdam getting there around 9:30. We walked into the bar, grabbed our usual Three Olives Cherry Vodka with 7-up and then looked around. For a place where Saturday nights used to be packed, it was dead. There were maybe 10 people in the bar. Justin and I quickly finished our drinks and headed out. It was a quick visit, but enough to make us realize why we had not stopped at Amsterdam on a Saturday night in months. Apparently no one else is going there either which is surprising because the last time we were there on a Friday night a few weeks back, it was pretty busy. I guess Amsterdam has lost their Saturday night touch in favor of Burn.
We hopped in the car and then down to Burn. We walked into Burn a few minutes before 10 and as expected there was no one in the bar except for the bartenders. Burn usually doesn't pick up until around 11:30 - 12:00. For some reason the Gay's really don't like to come out early anymore, but right around midnight the place will be jam packed.
As expected the bar started to pick up and was pretty busy by midnight, but for some reason we just weren't really feeling it. Maybe it was because Jerry was gone for the weekend with his parents, maybe because we were just tired, I don't know. It was great to see Angela and David and also talk to the bar staff and photographer, but by about 1 we were ready to head out. We decided to stop by Charlies before heading home to see what the crowd was like. We stayed long enough at Charlies to have one beer before we headed out the door and back home.
I don't know anymore, I'm really starting to get bored with the Phoenix bar scene and the people. It's the same people, the same places every weekend. While I do love going to Burn, and I still think it's a great place, I'm certainly ready for my trip to San Diego this weekend because I'm definitely need of a change of scenery for at least one weekend.
Today was spent by Justin and hanging out next to the pool during the afternoon and then catching up on some television programming this evening. It's been a relaxing and mellow weekend, one that I've much needed. I'm looking forward to getting caught up on some work this week and then heading out to San Diego on Thursday night. Cheers.Labels: Burn Nightclub Phoenix, Gay Bars, Gay Life, Phoenix
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I Figured Out Why I'm Bored
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 I was laying out by the pool this afternoon with Justin and it hit me why my life seems routine and I'm bored at the moment ... Because I miss my friends.
It's been several weeks since we've all seen each other and spent time together and I really miss being with the gang. No matter what our differences we always have so much fun when we're all together.
Last week when Justin, Jerry and I were at Burn I was honestly a little jealous of this group of friends who came in all wearing the same outfits and handing out invitations to certain people for one of their respective birthday parties. There are about 8 of them and we always see them out together, be it Burn, the White Party or wherever, they're always with each other as a group. It's this type of close group bond that Justin and I have been lacking since we moved away from San Francisco. Now that we have Jerry here it's really made things so much better, but I still miss the dynamics of having the entire group of us together at the same time.
Bernard lives in San Francisco, Philip lives in Los Angeles, Tony and DJ live in San Diego and Jerry, Justin and I are here in Phoenix so now that we're all spread out along the west coast it's not as easy for us hang out and usually takes something big like a party to get us all together again.
Some days I really wish we were are all back in the same city together again so we could just meet up like in the old days, go for a drink and hang out. Phoenix has always been a difficult place to make close friends who don't turn out to be complete flakes, so while it's great that Justin and I have been able to maintain the close bond with the former 'SF Crew', it's sometimes hard because feel somewhat isolated here in Phoenix without a core group.
I know things will feel much better next weekend when we're all back together again so I guess I'll just have to wait it out. Cheers!Labels: Gay Life, Random Thoughts
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Playing Catch Up and Enjoying My Evening
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 For some reason I always seem to want to start out every one of my posts with the words "I have to say ..." but I typically catch myself after typing the first few words and change it. Just an odd tidbit of information for you today.
As I sit here and type this it's 6:30 AM, and I'm just about to go into bed. It's actually been a pretty great night because I was finally able to spend the evening doing absolutely nothing at all, and it was fabulous.
Earlier last night, Justin and I went to pick up my Highlander from the Toyota Dealership where I dropped it off in the morning for a routine checkup and to have the oil changed before driving out to San Diego next week. Justin and I then headed over to the mall, stopped at Abercrombie so Justin could pick up some cologne, went to Best Buy and Circuit City to browse a the electronics, and then stopped at Red Robin for a quick bite to eat before heading home.
Once home I sat down on the couch and within minutes I was fast asleep where I remained until nearly midnight. Justin stayed in the office and played World of Warcraft while leaving me get some badly deserved rest. When I finally awoke I got up off the couch and saw that Justin wasn't sitting in the office anymore so I proceeded to walk down our hallway to the master bedroom where I opened the door and found Justin in the middle of a self-photo shoot with tripod setup and all. I laughed and said "So THIS is what you do when I'm napping on the couch!" He just laughed and showed me the pictures. The turned out well especially since he looks really great lately.
We both adjourned to the living room where we watched a little bit of TV before Justin informed me he was going to bed because he had to work in the morning, a small fact which I had forgotten. I told him I would be headed into the bedroom in a little bit, which I realize now was obviously not true since I wasn't tired at the time and I'm still up at the moment writing.
I actually spent the evening catching up on my blog reading, something I haven't taken the time to do in months. It was a nice change and good to catch up on the lives of some of my favorite bloggers. I just finished a few minutes ago so I thought I would write a quick post. I've been in the mood to write more lately, so I'm going to take advantage of it and do so.
So as the morning is here, Justin has just gotten up and is getting ready to head into work for a few hours, and the evening is technically just winding down for me. I'm about to head in to bed for a while and get a few hours of additional sleep. I have no plans this weekend except to rest, relax, enjoy myself, sit by the pool and perhaps even have a little bit of fun. I think our friend Jason might even stop over this afternoon to hang out by the pool with us.
So far it's been the type of weekend I've really needed as of late and I'm looking forward to every moment since i know next weekend in San Diego is going to be yet another jam packed adventure. Until later, Cheers!Labels: Random Thoughts
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I'm Ready For More
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Photo of me taken at Amsterdam on June-30-2007, my hair is finally growing back now.
I'm not really sure I can completely explain myself when I say I'm ready for more. It's really just a reoccurring feeling I've been having and a thought that's been going through my mind for the past few days.
Maybe this post would be better titled "I'm Ready For A Change" instead. I think I'm in need of a little change because it just feels like my life has gotten a bit routine and boring at the moment. Now don't confuse this with me being unhappy because that couldn't be any further from the truth. I'm very happy with my life, my relationship with Justin, my friendships, and my career, however I guess I'm just feeling a little bored right now. Just as hard as it is for me to describe, it's as equally hard for me to put my finger on exactly what it is that I'm feeling.
I partially think it comes from the fact that I continue to feel like there isn't enough time in the day. Most days I get up out of bed, head into our home office where I spend the day at my desk working until Justin comes home around 6. Most evenings we go tanning, come home and grab a bite to eat, head to the gym for a few hours, come home and then go to bed. It feels like I'm in a bit of a rut. I guess I'm not one for consistent routine and when it starts to happen I interpret it as being boring.
I'm not really sure how to even fix this. In previous years this would be the point where I would probably pack up and move to another city to shake things up a bit, and thus the reason why from 1994 to 2002 I moved to a new place on average of almost every 6 months. I do realize it's not a matter of me packing up and moving these days, I think it's just an issue that I need to modify my routine a bit. Maybe I need to get out of the house a little bit more as well. While I love working from home, it does help to change the scenery once and a while.
I really just wish that I had more time in the day where I could do some additional things like read some books, play more with Berger, spend time time outside, sit in front of the boob tube, and even spend some time on some various hobbies like photography which I've always wanted to get more into.
I am looking forward to getting out of town and heading to San Diego next weekend for San Diego pride and another weekend of parties, so that will be a slight reprieve from my boredom. I guess in the meantime I'll just have to find a way of shaking things up a little bit without really shaking things up too much to break anything if that makes sense. If only I could get the clock to stop for a few extra hours a day, that would solve everything. Alright enough of my incessant bitching, it's time to get back to my routine now so I'm off to the gym. Cheers!Labels: Gay Life, Random Thoughts
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Drinks with Jerry & Jason
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Justin and I headed up to Central Phoenix this evening to pick up Jerry and head over to Roscoe's on 7th to meet up with our friend Jason who is also originally from Philadelphia. I haven't really talked about Jason on my blog, but Justin and I met him a few months ago and he's a super sweet guy who both Justin and I love spending time with.
While the rest of the boys had a few drinks I was pretty much the designated driver since I couldn't eat or drink anything after 9 PM so as to not skew the lab work for blood sugar and cholesterol that I'm having done in the morning. We had a good conversation, a few laughs and then called it an evening at Roscoe's around midnight.
After we parted ways with Jason, we ended back at Jerry's house for a few minutes where we proceeded to talk about the fine line that defines appropriateness between friends. It was a rather interesting conversation which I would like to continue again another time, but as it was getting late, Justin and I decided to call it a night. We said our good bye to Jerry and headed home.
I'm off to Central Phoenix for blood work first thing in the morning and I'm even taking my Mother with me as a ride-along. I think we're going to grab lunch afterwards, so it will be nice to spend some time with her since I don't have much free time these days to offer her. Wish me luck on my cholesterol, it's been good lately so I'm hoping it's still that way. Cheers!Labels: Gay Bars
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Sex and Drugs in the Gay Community - Safety Information
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[PERSONAL NOTE REGARDING THIS POST]
I need to preface this blog post with a little bit of a content note or explanation. I originally posted the contents of this post as a series of 5 separate posts with the intention of giving out some general Safe Sex & Drug Safety Information to visitors to my blog. The motive for my original post was misundertood and it was seen as an endorsement of behavior, and that was not my intention. I'm reposting this because I simply would like to use the recent popularity of my blog within the Circuit Party community to offer up some clear, concise and unbiased factual information which is not readily available to most people in the States.
The information contained in this post is NOT an endorsement by me for drug use nor is it a statemet that or suggest that either me, my friends, or anyone that I personally spend time with uses, has used or has anything to do with recreational drugs. I want to post this information because I frequently attend Circuit Parties and I've seen things happen first hand that could have been prevented if people were better informed. Based on the number of random email's I've received with questions from people who are new to the Circuit party scene, I feel this is a good forum for me to give out this type of safety information as it may very well save someone life. Lastly, I am not a health care provider, or an authority on anything contained in this post, I'm simply providing the information as is publicly available in the pamphlets which were handed out at Black & Blue in Montreal. It is your responsibility to be safe and use your best judgment when it comes to matters of this nature. If you have any questions or comments regarding this post, please feel free to either leave me a comment in the blog or contact me directly at rich@cyrek.net
[Originally Posted As 'Gay Sex On Drugs - Safer Sex and Drugs']
 
Apparently the phrase 'Gay Sex On Drugs' is one of the keyphrases that has been landing people on my website. Crazy stuff since I wouldn't think I've ever actually talked about this subject to get any hit's from it. I'm not sure if it's a good or bad, but I do find it slightly amusing. So in light of popularity of my blog within the gay community and the recent hit's for this topic, I've decided to provide some information regarding Safer Sex & Drugs which was handed out to us as a public service during the Black & Blue parties in Montreal. If you actually landed on my blog in search of 'Gay Sex On Drugs' you may find some of this interesting and helpful in making an informed decision regarding your safety.
 
The Party Needs You!
Healthy Promotion & Prevention Tips
Courtesy of BBCM Foundation Canada
“The party needs you, enjoy yourself and be safe. It is not necessary to use drugs to have a good time. Music can give you all the energy and pleasure you need in a natural way. We care about you and we want you there!”
Sex and Drugs
Drugs and alcohol may make some people feel more relaxed and increase their self-confidence but they also interfere with the ability to make sound decisions. Impaired judgement from drug use can lead to risky sexual behavior, including choosing to have sex or agreeing to be a bottom when you otherwise wouldn’t or not using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse. Drugs can delay an orgasm, diminish vaginal lubrication in women and decrease the ability to feel pain they leading to long sessions of intercourse which can result in trauma accompanies with breakdown of mucous membrane leading to easier infection with HIV or other STDs. So always carry a condom with you and make sure that you use it at all times with lots of lubrication.
Think Ahead, Partying Safely Requires Some Thought!
• Be in a positive state of mind.
• Plan to have a good time. Have a healthy body, rest before and eat well.
• Partying with friends, great music & high energy can be fun without drugs.
• Know your own body and mind. What works for others may not work for you.
• Plan to pace yourself including your drug intake and the type of drugs you take.
• Remember, most drugs are not what you think. Purity is not guaranteed.
• Start slowly. See how your body reacts before taking more.
• Don’t mix drugs. The cocktail may be lethal.
• Avoid alcohol. It dehydrates you and can have a disastrous effect with K, G, and other drugs.
• Take breaks. Keep cool and hydrated. Make sure to urinate during the party.
• Safe sex! Safe sex! Safe sex! Must we keep repeating ourselves?
• Know when to say no. Stop if you feel or think you have taken too much.
• Tell it like it is. If you’re in trouble ask for help.
• Are you using too much or too frequently? You can get help.
IMPORTANT NOTE:
If someone you know gets sick, or goes unconscious due to a drug overdose or other reasons, seek out help at the infirmary on site immediately, or get them to a qualified paramedic. Waiting too long or ignoring the problem could be fatal for the person involved.
Remember: Don’t die of embarrassment!
If you need help, or if one of your friends is sick, it is very important to inform the medical personnel of the exact type and amount of drugs taken. This is the time to tell the truth and trust in the staff that is there to help. This is the only way they will know what kind of action to take to prevent serious complications with may lead to permanent damage or death. Your confidentiality is respected at all times.
GHB (G)
Gamma hydroxy butyrate (GHB) is a central nervous system depressant developed as a medical anesthetic. GHB has been produced in varying purities in clandestine labs. GBL (Blue Nitro, Reviverent, Renewtrient) is another drug similar to GHB. GBL takes longer then GHB to be metabolized so the onset of the effects is slower, and the effects last longer. It is difficult to tell GHB from GBL. It is recommend to wait an extra half an hour before taking a booster shot if one is not experiencing the usual effects of the drug. Reports from recreational users say GHB produces a euphoric and intensified sexual state. Typically it is sold in liquid, capsule and tablet form. The liquid form is the main means of ingestion and is often described as salty or “chemical” in taste. The drug can cause amnesia, muscle tension release, drowsiness and, in high doses, abrupt unconsciousness. Other side effects vary from nausea, vomiting, dizziness, and confusion, to seizure-like activity. GHB can be dangerous especially when used with alcohol. Repeated use if not timed properly can lead to overdose.
DANGERS
GHB affects everyone differently. The same amount taken by one person may react totally differently in another. The purity of GHB is unreliable. Taking GHB can be dangerous because you don’t know its strength when purchased, or how much it has been diluted. Some studies have shown that GBH can be psychologically addictive. Depressants such as alcohol, ketamine and tranquilizers (valium, xanax) increase the effects of GHB to a potentially dangerous level. Methamphetamine when used with GHB can produce seizures. Several deaths have been reported as a result of the combination of GHB with alcohol and party drugs. If you have any history of seizures, convulsions, slowed heartbeat, or low blood pressure, GHB is especially dangerous. It is difficult to tell GHB apart from GBL. Wait at least a full hour before taking more if you do not feel the expected effects. It is VERY important to not the following: If someone has “fallen out” from use of too much GHB, it is EXTREMELY important to not give the person any other drugs to “wake them up”. Get them to a medic immediately. Administering drugs such as coke, speed or crystal puts the person at risk for a heart attack. Do NOT do G when alone.
CRYSTAL (Methamphetamine, “Crystal”, “Tina”)
Crystal-methamphetamine is a highly addictive form of speed. It is available in the form of rocks or crystal-like powder (hence the name). Crystal makes people feel energetic, horny, and able to go without sleep or food for days. It can be taken nasally, orally, anally, intravenously or by smoking. Some effects of Crystal include: extreme itching of the skin, dilated pupils, diarrhea, increased heart rate and blood pressure. Crystal is processed by the liver, so the added strain may make other medications you are taking including those for HIV more difficult to tolerate. The use of Crystal in combination with other recreational drugs can be very dangerous and can increase serious side effects.
DANGERS
Crystal floods the brain with dopamine, causing a definite high followed by an equally definite and often devastating low when the user crashes. Users build up a tolerance to the drug very quickly, so greater quantity is needed to achieve the same high. Some negative effects caused by this drug are: depression, psychosis, hallucinations, stroke, aggression, and liver damage. Many lives have been ruined by this drug so be prudent! If you have heart disease, high blood pressure, epilepsy and liver problems, Crystal is extremely dangerous for your health. Medications such as antidepressants and decongestants affect breakdown of methamphetamine. Crystal is one of the known drugs that changes your brain chemistry by destroying brain cells, leading to memory loss and potential Parkinson’s like symptoms. It lowers all inhibitions and this may lead to unsafe sex practices. You can get help if you think you are using too much. If you use Crystal … handle with care!
KETAMINE (Special K, K)
Known as Special K, Ketamine is in fact a rapid-acting nonbarbituate general anesthetic used for diagnostic and surgical procedures in medical environments. While it may induce a relaxing feeling, it is also a cardio respiratory stimulant, chemically similar to PCP (phencyclidine). When taken recreationally in the form of powder across the nasal membrane, it slows motor skills and causes sensory effects, including changes in the perception of sight (colour, space), hearing, time and movement. The drug can also cause impairment of immediate and delayed recall. Depending on the tolerance of the user, the quality of the drug, the quantity taken, and the simultaneous use of other drugs, it can cause psychological dissociation, hallucinations, “live dreams” and a severe momentary loss of motor and sensory skills for a certain period of time (referred to as a “K Hole” by users). The drug can also cause severe nausea and vomiting when alcohol is consumed before, during or after. Small quantities can create a big effect, which can be relatively short lived. Dependence can develop requiring larger and larger quantities of K to obtain a renew effect.
DANGERS
Extreme care should be taken when using this drug, with or without the simultaneous use of other drugs and/or alcohol. AVOID at all cost the use of K with GHB, tranquilizers, anti-depressants, over the counter decongestants, marijuana, and protease inhibitors. If you have any history of paranoia, anxiety, mania or mood disorders, you are likely to have a very bad K experience. If you do use K, use it sparingly and wait at least an hour before doing more. If you chose to use K let your friends know so they can keep an eye on you, just in case you find yourself in trouble. If someone you know has trouble breathing, loses consciousness, or experiences heart problems due to K or combination of other drugs seek help immediately. Speaking to someone in a calm tone and manner often helps to reduce their negative feelings during a “K-hole”. Don’t use K if you suffer from heart disease, high blood pressure, epilepsy, and thyroid disease. Ketamine may also lead to “chemical hepatitis”, an inflammation of the liver resulting in jaundice. To prevent accidents, it is suggest to not ingest K when alone. Do not driver a car when on K.
COCAINE (Coke)
Available in powder or crystals (rocks), it can be smoked or absorbed across the nasal membrane, injected or taken as a suppository. Effects are very similar to amphetamine. While high the user may experience feelings of euphoria, increased sense of insight, confidence and alertness, distortion of perception, and delusions of grandeur. Physical manifestations may include; increased heart rate, enlarged pupils, raised body temperature, jaw tension, teeth grinding and chewing. Larger doses may slow breathing and lower blood pressure. If you inject the drug use clean needles, an never share your syringe with anyone else. When coming down, expect feelings of depression, agitation, headaches, nausea and vomiting. The more you take, the greater these effects will be.
DANGERS
Be aware that the use of cocaine may cause severe psychological dependence. It can also have dangerous effects on the cardiac system, regardless of age. If you have chest pain while on Coke, seek medical attention immediately. Cocaine can be especially dangerous when taken with drugs like ecstasy. Be aware that cocaine when combined with alcohol will produce a compound called coca ethylene which is very toxic to the body. Cocaine can interact with several of the medications used for HIV+, including protease inhibitors, ketoconazole, and TB medications. It can also interact negatively with antidepressants. Avoid cocaine if you have heart disease, high blood pressure, epilepsy, liver disease and diabetes.
ECSTASY (“MDMA”, “E”, “X”)
MDMA is a synthetic drug derived from amphetamine in Germany in 1912. It is available in pill, powder and capsule form. As with other drugs, the effects will depend on the purity of the drug, the quantity taken, the user’s general health, physical size, tolerance to the drug, previous use and other drugs taken at the same time. Generally, the user experiences a relaxed, smooth mood. This drug can make you feel happy, friendly and open, mainly by increasing the amount of available serotonin (a chemical transmitter in your brain that controls emotions, anxiety and clearness of thought). Use may also cause: irritability, anxiety, increased blood pressure, paranoia/psychosis, aggression, nervousness, convulsions, heart and blood vessel toxicity, insomnia, loss of appetite, hallucinations, and addiction. It can also make you sweat and overheat, depending on the user and the amount taken. It is very important to hydrate yourself, and to eliminate toxins by going to the bathroom in order to prevent short term and or long term kidney problems.
DANGERS
Be aware that some of the additives to Ecstasy include the following: caffeine, baking soda, decongestants, dog worming medicine, PCP, amphetamines, and PMA. Not much is known about the long term effect of Ecstasy on your brain. Recent research has demonstrated some potential impact on memory & emotion. Dependence may develop and those who do a lot report that greater quantity is needed to get the same effect. Ecstasy elevates heart rate and blood pressure. If you have high blood pressure, diabetes, asthma or a heart condition don’t use Ecstasy. Hydration is important but an excessive amount of water in your body can also be dangerous. Drinks with sodium such as Gatorade, or snacks containing salt can help replenish lost fluids & minerals. It is suggested to drink one cup of fluid per hour. If you find yourself unable to urinate seek help. Do not take ecstasy if you are HIV+ and using a protease inhibitor, as the combination can be very harmful. Other medication such as antidepressants, antipsychotics, and decongestants can also be harmful.
POPPERS
There are two main forms “amyl nitrate” and “butyl nitrate”. Used in recreational activities, it enhances music, rhythm, movement and lights. “Amyl nitrate is packaged in small glass ampoules (hence the name “poppers”, the sound when snapped open). This is very difficult to find at this time. “Butyl nitrate” derivatives are available in 12 ml screw-top bottles. Volatile nitrites are consumed by inhaling fumes through sniffing. These drugs, if spilled, can burn the skin, and are highly toxic if swallowed or injected. Poppers alter the dilation of blood vessels and lower the body’s blood pressure. The user may experience a pounding heart, a sense of warmth, exaltation, giddiness, heightened awareness of light, sound, movement, and sensory perception. Hallucinations may occur. Poppers relax smooth muscle tissue (like your anus) and deaden your senses. As a result you may be unaware of soreness or tearing during sex putting you at risk for HIV, STD’s, and physical trauma.
DANGERS
Poppers can have a disinhibiting effect, increasing the likelihood of engaging in unsafe sexual behavior during and after use. Overuse can lessen the effects and some people report nausea, headaches and loss of erection. Some reports suggest that brain cells might be destroyed by its use. Any spills on the skin can be washed with lots of water. Be careful if in haling through the mouth. Do not drink or inject. Little is known about possible interactions with antiviral drugs. Poppers should not be used if you have heart problems and ESPECIALLY if you have taken Viagra within the last 24 hours.
Labels: Circuit Party, Gay Sex
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Misunderstood
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You may or may not realize something is missing. I guess it really depends upon the last time my blog was viewed and which entries were posted at that time. Tonight I decided to take down a series of 5 consecutive posts which I published over the last two days because I believe the context of these posts was misunderstood.
What was originally intended to be a source of some helpful safety information for people who were in need of some direct, no-nonsense, non-objective, concise and factually correct documentation was seen by some as an endorsement of a specific behavior. This was by no means what I had intended.
Honestly, I saw the opportunity to use the recent popularity of my blog to republish some information contained in a pamphlet which was handed out to my friends and I while visiting Montreal for Black & Blue last fall. While I posted the text of the document in it's entirety, I believe pieces of the information were taken out of context, the overall meaning of the combined posts was lost, and an incorrect assumption made as to the motive for my posts.
Had this been personal documentation, experiences or opinion I would have hesitated upon taking it down, but because I was merely reposting the text of a publicly available document, I was not completely averse to the suggestion that maybe I rethink it's inclusion in my blog at this point.
I am however, currently struggling on what defines the fine line of self-censorship and appropriateness among interested parties. This blog is a living documentation of my life, my experiences, my friendships, and the issues and topics I think are important. I would never ask anyone to sacrifice their privacy or reputation based on my content, but this blog is not just a frivolous hobby, it's truly an important part of my life and I really do not want to censor what I write or the content provided in this forum.
Since I understand it's not always in the best interest of certain parties who may be incorrectly linked to some of my content based on association by inclusion alone, I've decided to take down these posts for the moment but be assured it's only a temporary solution to alleviate any misunderstandings until I can decide where that line of appropriateness actually falls and how to proceed with a long term solution which will not censor my content. Cheers
Post [Gay Sex On Drugs [Part I] - Hits to My Blog] Removed
Post [Gay Sex On Drugs [Part II] - Safer Sex and Drugs] Removed
Post [Gay Sex On Drugs [Part III] - The Drugs G & Crystal] Removed
Post [Gay Sex On Drugs [Part IV] - The Drugs K & Coke] Removed
Post [Gay Sex On Drugs [Part IV] - The Drugs E & Poppers] Removed
Labels: Random Thoughts
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Windows Vista Rocks ... Sort Of.
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So after many hours of frustration and several unsuccessful attempts at installing Windows Vista on my desktop computer I finally gave up and restored the backup image of the primary hard drive containing Windows XP SP2 which I created before going down this horrid path.
 I've actually been trying to get Windows Vista installed on this desktop since Beta 2 with no luck. I'm sure its some combination of the motherboard, drive array, video card and memory that's not working correctly but I just don't have time to deal with and spend any more precious hours trying to figure out why it doesn't work. The kicker is that it's pretty new high end hardware, so one would think it actually would work but it doesn't.
I did however manage to upgrade my Dell D820 Laptop to Windows Vista Ultimate last night and that installation went without a hitch. I really didn't want to install Vista on my laptop eventhough the upgrade was free for me from Dell, because I use my laptop for work and I didn't want to take the chance that it would be crippled. Fortunatly for me it's not, everything works fine including all the applications that I need.
It really is amazing at how two different systems can cause someone such a different experience when it comes to the installation of an operating system. I find it questionable that Microsoft didn't work out many of the problems they were having with the software before releasing it, but as a former Software Engineer, I realize it's impossible to catch almost everything. People are simply human and mistakes are commonplace. But, so far so good with the laptop, Vista is running smoothly and I haven't experienced any problems yet, so I'll keep my fingers crossed.
Yeah I know this is probably a pretty boring, geeky, tech post, but it's what I've been doing for the past 2 evenings and sometimes I just can't help the fact that I'm a closet geek at heart. Cheers!Labels: Technology
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Searching for Sex in the Morning
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[This Post Is A Continuation From The Previous Post 'Oh What A Night']
I'm going to preface this post by saying that after several teaser 'I'm gonna get deeper posts', I'm finally going to dive into a bit of the behind the scenes of our life. Now I know I really haven't talked about it before, but Justin has mentioned it on his blog, I've eluded too it, and I will eventually discuss it in a post one of these days, but Justin and I have an open relationship. We've had an open relationship for several years now which in simplistic terms means that we fuck around with other people. Sometimes we do it together, sometimes apart, it really just depends on our mood and the situation. I don't want to get into that bag of worms [discussion] right now either so I promise I'll write another post specifically about it soon, I'm just providing some background information so you're not confused as to the rest of the story.
Once we got home, neither one of us was very tired so we did what all gay boys do at 6 AM after returnin | | | |
